In February, the month of LOVE, most of us would have spent some time planning to do or give something special to someone we love. We might have also anticipated receiving a gift or gesture in return. But how many of you spent some time loving YOU?
Nowadays, ‘self love’ is almost hotter than Fluro was in the 80’s, but what does it really mean - to practise ‘self love’?
Does it mean to have long bubble baths, paint your toes and put on a detoxifying face mask? Well kind of, it very well could and those things are beautiful ways to love yourself! But, its important to highlight that there is a difference with ‘loving yourself’ practises versus ‘self love’ practises’.
Self love, self esteem, self actualisation are all similar concepts that reflect a practise which champions your Self, in its imperfect perfection. They are about making a conscious effort to practise self love each day, in the face of challenges and adversity. In other words, its about loving yourself for the beautiful and unique individual that you are and applying that to the way you live your life and how you allow others to treat you.
Are you the kind of person who believes they are good enough, but others are probably way better; the kind of person who squirms a little at the thought of charging enough for your professional services, chooses the flight response over standing up for yourself in difficult situations?
If this is you, then perhaps your inner self is struggling a little, as it is missing your crucial undoubting support!! Your inner cheer squad is on holidays, and you want it back!
But how? Well, thankfully, even the littlest efforts can encourage long held beliefs to start changing.
Try by practising this simple, reflective exercise once or twice a fortnight.
Set aside a little time once a week to look at yourself in the mirror. Stand there, for 3 minutes and look. Look at everything you see on yourself. Notice what thoughts pop into your mind “I don’t like.. I wish I had.. I love… “. When you have finished, write down the thoughts that really stood out.
With this list, I want you to analyse them - ask yourself:
Where do these beliefs come from? (media, parents, friends, ex-partners)
Are they useful for me? (do they hold me back?)
Do they make me feel less adequate, and if so, how do I feel about that?
Do I believe them? If yes, how would I feel if I didn’t believe them?
I want you to think about these answers, and start to build a picture in your mind of your own beautiful unique self and how perhaps you have not been your own best friend. From here, the choice is yours to start to become that self-loving person, to champion your own awesomeness and apply it in how you live your life.
Warmth, peace and love to you,